decisions, decisions

i'm so happy now that spring is finally showing its pretty green head. i didn't realise how miserable the cold and snow had been making me. we've been out walking every day, and i LOVE it. i'm the world's most un-sporty person but i do love to walk when the weather is good. today lola and i walked over to bruno's parents' garden, in the next little town, about half an hour away. we bumped across fields and past plots of pruned and prepared grapevines (this area produces some nice white wines). there was a distinctive whiff of manure in the air. there were lots of people out walking, and, amazingly, some of them were actually smiling!!!

lola had a wonderful time tramping around the garden, spying out bugs and pointing at flowers and passing dogs, giving her special doggy impersonation every time ('woof, wooo'). the garden is just beginning to bloom - bright yellow flowers, pale pink and crimson nubbins of rhubarb just forcing their way through the earth, seed beds freshly turned and prepared. from now until the end of autumn bruno's parents will spent at least a few hours every day (and often all day at the height of summer) in their garden, planting, weeding, and harvesting. they grow (at various times) carrots, onions, potatoes, tomatoes, eggplants, rhubarb, zucchinis, capsicums, radishes, kohlrabi, assorted salads (including nüsslisalat in winter), normal strawberries (max and lola will each have their own patch), wild strawberries, raspberries, blackberries, red and whitecurrants and a bewildering array of beautiful flowers, none of which i know the names of (black thumb that i am). max spends a lot of time in the garden with bruno's parents, and i hope lola will, too. it's good for them to know where food comes from, and how things grow. it's just a shame that a pathological hatred of having dirty hands runs through both sides of the family - both bruno and i hated having dirty hands as  kids (actually, i still do), and max at least has definitely inherited this trait. as for lola, well, who knows. she does take great pains to point out any specks of food or dirt to me the instant they appear on her palms so the prognosis doesn't look too promising...

we're still stuck in the throes of decision-making re. to bruno's job situation. but i think we are almost at a point where we can make a decision and say that we have made it knowing all the ins and outs, ups and downs, loopholes, tax benefits, etc etc. we've tried to think of everything that this change could possibly affect, and taken it all into consideration. we've spoken to practically everyone we know and asked them their opinion. surprisingly, or not so surprisingly, almost everyone said to go with the job closer to home with better money but the distinct (absolute?) possibility of boredom on the job. and i think we agree. family is the priority, especially when the grommets are small. time enough for career stuff later. in the meantime, we do what we need to to stay afloat and hopefully work up a few good sidelines which may or may not become full-time concerns.

bruno needs to say yes or no tomorrow. i reckon we need to make this decision, and then not look back or regret what might have been. just go with the new thing and be positive about it. i have a sort-of philosophy of always moving in a forward motion, and trying not to regret any decisions i have made. i like to think that i would have made the decision with full knowledge of the implications and i was doing what i thought was right at the time (even if that proves to be wrong at a later stage). there is no point beating yrself up about making a 'wrong' decision.

the thought of spending another summer here at the lakeside makes me feel very happy. afternoons swimming at the badi, picking strawberries in the garden, bbq's on the balcony, maybe a trip outside of switzerland or down to anzère. we've made ourselves a nice little life here and i'm glad that we're not going to be changing it.

Comments

[Lushlife]

I am so glad that the decision seems to be crystalising for you - I too need that process and also the one where I then countdown to the change - I don't like making decisions that affect the entire family on the spur of the moment.

I think these days it seems to be everyone is trying to balance family and work far better than we have in the past, especially because there are now two parents who want to be as interactive with their children's lives as possible.

I am very much affected by the weather as well, I am finding some joy in our change of seasons too, not so damn hot! I don't think I will be enjoying the middle part though, colds and assorted illnesses. But for now a crisp fresh morning is a thing of beauty.